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Do You Care Too Much?

January 26th, 2010 · 4 Comments

by William D. Esteb

www.smilemarketing.com

One of the occupational hazards of dentists and others in the healing arts is setting appropriate boundaries around caring for patients and what they do. While some in dentistry tout how much they care, perhaps as a marketing ploy, the truth is few patients are looking for a caring dentist! Because “caring” is mostly a hygiene factor. If you show up care-less, that is, without enough caring, patients detect your aloofness and interpret your detachment as a lack of interest. If you show up caring too much, you create a patient obligation that can actually work against you. The objective is to find the sweet spot between the extremes.

Of course, most dentists are unaware of those instances in which they cross the line by caring too much. However, if you’re trading patients with other dentists in your area, having the equivalent of a series of “one night stands,” you may be guilty of this all-too common trait among the most empathetic dentists.

What Patients Hate More

As a dentist, you probably haven’t seen it through this lens, but there’s something that patients find more distasteful than seeing a dentist. It’s seeing a new dentist.

When patients contemplate changing dentists, they can’t help but think of the formidable paperwork, the new environment, new procedures, new personalities and not to mention the general hassle factor. Changing dentists is so unsavory, a dentist would have to inflict a lot of pain to prompt a patient to seek out a new one. But they often do. Oh, not physical pain! Sure, that can happen. But more frequently, it’s psychological pain.

Using Your Cultural Authority

When you care too much, you impose an obligation or create an expectation of a certain patient behavior. It’s often justified as being in the patient’s best interests or the duty of a licensed professional. Even if you see it as merely a polite reminder about the importance of regular flossing, patients with moderate- to low-levels of self-esteem can interpret your well-intentioned suggestion as a prerequisite for being a practice member. Or what “good” patients do.

Each patient, not you, decides if your suggestions or recommendations are an imposition. And it may have nothing to do with the actual words you use, but merely the tone of your voice, body language and countless other nuances. That’s why it’s critical that you care, but not too much.

The Sweet Spot

One way to supply the essential information and guidance is to take a more oblique approach, moving from the first person, “It’s my opinion that you…” or “I think you should…” to the third person: “Many of our patients find…” or “Over the years we’ve noticed…” Patients are more likely to see this as a respectful acknowledgment of their free will—without it being packaged in an obligation that the patient may not be prepared to live up to.

If your heart is clouded by the financial payoff you hope to achieve by inducing patients to embrace your care recommendations, you’ve crossed the boundary between ministry and manipulation. One way to know if patients perceive that you’ve crossed this invisible line is to take an inventory of how many patients in typical month are first timers as a ratio to total patient visits. The higher the number, the leakier your bucket.

Tags: Business of Dentistry

4 responses so far ↓

  • 1 Pat // Jan 26, 2010 at 12:10 pm

    Very insightful post. There are so many aspects to the Dr./ patient relationship it is nice to get a fresh perspective on things like this. I see particular value in keeping certain discussions and recommendations in a “third party” context.

  • 2 Pat // Jan 26, 2010 at 12:10 pm

    Very insightful post. There are so many aspects to the Dr./ patient relationship it is nice to get a fresh perspective on things like this. I see particular value in keeping certain discussions and recommendations in a “third party” context.

  • 3 Children Dentist // Jan 29, 2010 at 7:35 pm

    I am one of those dentists who are guilty of caring too much.

  • 4 Children Dentist // Jan 29, 2010 at 7:35 pm

    I am one of those dentists who are guilty of caring too much.

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